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The Message Board is currently in read-only mode, as the software is now out of date. Several features and pages have been removed. If/When I get time I intend to re-launch the board with updated software.


I'm back... sort of.

 
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Clayton Blind Love
Redemption


Joined: 30 Jul 2004
Posts: 772
Location: Beautiful British Columbia

PostPosted: Sat Jun 30, 2007 7:51 pm    Post subject: I'm back... sort of. Reply with quote

My mother passed away. 61 years old. Too soon.

Here is her obituary to get a sense of who she was to me.

SCHOLEFIELD - Marie Antoinette "Toni" January 31, 1946 to June 20, 2007 It is with great sadness that we announce the passing of our beautiful and loving wife, mother, and grandmother Toni Scholefield, who fought a very courageous battle with cancer. She leaves behind her best friend and soulmate husband Ken, her two loving sons, Erik (Heather) and Clayton (Jessica) and her 3 beautiful grandchildren Sofia, Adam and Lochlan, also father-in-law Erik (Basia) Scholefield. She also leaves behind special sister Barb (Richard), brother John (Donna) and sister Marjorie. Also predeceased by her parents James and Louise Purdie and mother-in-law Betty Scholefield. Toni was a very vibrant and beautiful person who lived life with nothing but love in her heart. For Toni there were no greater things in life than her husband, children and their families. She was known as a very loyal friend and was often if not always the centre of attention. Known also for her fierce competitiveness she excelled on the golf course and the card table. Being a well known hockey mother she was always at the game with her husband behind the bench with either of her 2 sons on the ice. The love of family and friendship carried Toni through her life and graced everyone whom she met. She is also survived by many nieces, nephews and life long friends. Thanks to all of her doctors and nurses at Peace Arch Hospital and the Fraser Valley Cancer Centre. With a special thanks to Dr. Lowe, Dr. Norris and Dr. Wong. In lieu of flowers a donation could be made to the Fraser Valley Cancer Centre in memory of Toni.

"Mom"

Thank-you for your time Our mother and wife You kept us all together And with love-lived your life. Gone but never forgotten You will always be here Through the paths as we go on We will feel you near. Until we all meet again As the circle comes together You live on within us Cause your love is forever... Love Ken, Erik & Clayton


It has been a very hard month. It still is. I'll return to posting soon.

C.
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Francesco
Underboss


Joined: 08 Jun 2006
Posts: 1307

PostPosted: Sun Jul 01, 2007 4:50 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'm very sorry to learn this. My condolences.
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Meador
Flying Blind


Joined: 02 Jun 2005
Posts: 97
Location: COLORADO

PostPosted: Sun Jul 01, 2007 7:05 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Clayton, I am sorry to read of your loss. My condolences and prayers go out to you and your family. Hang in there.
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Last edited by Meador on Sun Jul 01, 2007 10:07 am; edited 1 time in total
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Gloria
Redemption


Joined: 28 Apr 2007
Posts: 711
Location: Suburbia around Barcelona

PostPosted: Sun Jul 01, 2007 9:28 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

My condolences.
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Gloria
Devuélveme el rosario de mi madre y quédate con todo lo demás

"Para la cuesta arriba quiero mi burro, que la cuesta abajo yo me la subo"
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the truebeliever
Flying Blind


Joined: 04 Jul 2006
Posts: 80
Location: Starke, Florida

PostPosted: Sun Jul 01, 2007 4:57 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'm so sorry. You have my condolenses and your family will be in my prayers.
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rgj
Hardcore


Joined: 29 Jul 2004
Posts: 1580
Location: The Rio Grande Valley of Texas

PostPosted: Sun Jul 01, 2007 5:59 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

My condolences, Clayton.

rgj
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fox_limbo
Humanity's Fathom


Joined: 01 Aug 2004
Posts: 335

PostPosted: Sun Jul 01, 2007 10:59 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'm sorry to hear of your loss, Clayton.

As I stated in the thread discussing Alice (Darediva)'s struggle with the death of her mother (and the emotional termoil of the Viginia Tech shootings, particularly that she is a Hokie, herself), the struggle to deal with the death of a parent is a difficult one.

Even though I've dealt with the death of my father a couple of years ago (which had also been discussed in that thread, as well, so I've spare you the "broken record" routine), as easy as it may sound for me to say this, and even though there are emotions of frustration, shock, emptiness, sadness, it may be a good idea to also celebrate the person your mother was and what she meant to you and represented in your life.

(I'm going to do what I can to echo that same sentiment to a mentally handicapped friend of mine who lost his own mother this weekend, after having lost his father as recently as last year from cancer. Truth be told, that death is hitting me a lot harder than I thought it would... but I'll do what I can to be the best friend I can be.)

As pointed out by the others here, we at the manwithoutfear.com message board, wish you, and your family, all our best during this difficult time, Clayton.

Be well. Be kind.

Take care.
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The Privateer
Redemption


Joined: 24 Jan 2005
Posts: 740
Location: South Derbyshire, England

PostPosted: Mon Jul 02, 2007 2:41 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Clayton, I'm thinking of you and your family at this time. My condolences on your loss. Regards, Jon.
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Dimetre
Underboss


Joined: 16 Feb 2006
Posts: 1366
Location: Toronto

PostPosted: Mon Jul 02, 2007 12:24 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

My condolences Clayton.

I lost my father to colon cancer two years ago. When you're ready you may find that it helps to talk to open up to others going through the same thing. I'm not sure what's available to you in British Columbia. We have a Gilda's Club in Toronto. I was going to a weekly bereavement group meeting there, and I felt like I not only was helping myself, but I was helping others as well. I liked Gilda's Club because it specifically has to do with cancer, meaning that everyone in the group had gone through something somewhat similar. There may be a Gilda's Club in Vancouver, or perhaps a Wellspring centre.

It's just a suggestion. I just think it's important to take good care of yourself after such a loss, and to give yourself all the help you need.
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Darediva
Wake Up


Joined: 29 Jul 2004
Posts: 1208
Location: Hell's Kitchen South, Arkansas, USA

PostPosted: Mon Jul 02, 2007 9:10 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I just read this thread, Clayton, and want to send you my condolences. No matter how long we keep our parents, it's tough to let them go, and your mother went way too young.

That was a very nice obituary, and it clearly shows what a well-loved person she was.

My thoughts are with you and your entire family.
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Those who throw dirt merely lose ground.
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Clayton Blind Love
Redemption


Joined: 30 Jul 2004
Posts: 772
Location: Beautiful British Columbia

PostPosted: Tue Jul 10, 2007 6:20 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thanks for the very kind words everyone. I appreciate the support.

C.
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Won't you wrap the night around me
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